The last card in card game of six. There it was; small, fragile and impulsive
Just like any other, too eager to grow and take his place in life. But like signing a contract, he didn’t read the fine prints.
There were terms, but not his. The rules were made, but not by him. Same rules his parents cunningly worked to liberate him from despite the contract one has to sign under duress.
Like a wild horse he wants to run, with the wind on his back and so it gently brushes against his childish grin he wears to show the world he cares less about the game life plays.
Life can be cruel, he was told. Stay in the box. There are wolves outside the fence.With no repress or defense, he just defiled them all.
Regardless of the odds, he would never be a sucker to a system rigged seamlessly to see him restrained.Wild horses run, and recklessly too with no fear of repercussion.
Like the mixture of sweet wine and poison, the happiest moments were those tainted with pain.
Anger can be soothing. It is the only companion that understands what is really going on beneath the cold calculated stare, with expressionless eyes on a face that so easily changes color, and a humorless laughter.
Now no longer can he run free, break the rules, or step out of the box; he was stuck because once is a charm, twice is the luck.
Tough luck. Straddled on both ankles with the illusion of time working backwards with the many if nots and may bes, the left knee buckles under pressure.
Shattering the hope of an alternate plan. Now there is the doubt. The once free spirited wild horse do not know if it should run or trot or stop.
Perception can be tricky, so is the illusion of been an exception to the rule of cause and consequence, and been able to live it up without self destruct.
They all seem to know what’s in your head even if they have not lived a day of your life, or know the self-induced pressure you constantly go through. And with such arrogance and entitlement, they point their fingers and laugh when they are no better. If only they knew better?
Groping in the dark has its benefits however. It teaches you focus, if you’re still willing to learn. It teaches you perseverance, if you did not quit. And it teaches you how to be your companion, if you went through such lonely phases more often than once.
Pain is a teacher, I learnt to absolve them. Learn them. And feel them.
Time is a healer, I learnt discipline. Focus. Logic.There and then life began to be bearable. It occasionally makes sense but I don’t trust my five sense enough, to trust their judgment will be without bias.
The lesson in all these either by learning or feeling hate, betrayal, or any other negative emotions for the first time; can be internalized or you experienced.
There will be tomorrow. It is beautiful. Filled with possibilities or not.
There is today. Time is bountiful, filled with pain or not.
There was yesterday. It was eventful. Filled with lessons or not.
You’re at liberty to see life in any light you so desire. It is your perception not mine.We don’t have to share the same outlook to life. And your opinion doesn’t necessarily bother me.
